D23!

a jordan lambert July 26, 2017

Whoa! So, I'm late on writing and posting this, but because I basically left for San Diego Comic Con right after it was over; I didn't have a chance to think/talk about this at all. BUT. I had my first ever D23 experience this year! My friend Melissa asked me to escort her to the every other year event, and of course I said yes, because if it involves Disney, Horror, Sci-Fi, or Punk Rock, I am there. I had a lot of fun! We only went for Sunday, and didn't attend any panels, but it was still a fantastic experience, and one that I'd love to do again.

If you've been to a larger convention than you won't be surprised by D23 - it's got all of the old familiars; badges, badge pick-up, long lines, an Exhibitor's Hall, swag being handed out, exclusives for sale, panels, crummy food, and more people than I'm comfortable being around in one day lol. I will say, that the D23 line up at the beginning of the day was not what I expected from Disney - it was very organized or accesible for people who need consideration - and I hope that changes in the future. After a few hours in line and in the sun, Melissa and I made it inside to the Exhibition Hall. I didn't take very many pictures, as I was pushing Melissa's wheelchair. That said, the Exhibition Hall didn't seem very full, and friends who have attended D23 before generally agreed and told me there was less to do this year. It was my first year, so I was super impressed! There was a lot of cool Disney merchandise for sale, tons of beautiful and unique cosplayers, and a few interactive activations including a Ducktales Money Bin to jump in (which I sadly missed the chance to partake in, due to poor communication of instructions), and a Pirates of the Carribean walk through. Disney Animation had a large booth with maquettes and models and animation stills. Even Jelly Belly was in on the game; making Disney themed art out of jellybeans.

The news that came out of D23? Let's jump into it!

Movie News -

Toy Story 4 - TS4 will be coming out in June 2019 and I don't know how I feel about it. I think the third installment ended that series perfectly, but I am excited because Rashida Jones worked on the script. So, I'm really torn.

Ralph Breaks the Internet - Nearly all of the Disney princesses will be in this movie with their original voice actresses. Pinch me, I'm crying.

The Untitled Pixar Film That Takes You To A Suburban Fantasy World - Written by Dan Scanlon who also helmed Monsters University and that's basically all we know. I'm still in.

Coco - Not much new news, but I'm still stoked for this one.

Frozen 2 - Nothing really new revealed. I'm not really a Frozen fan, so...

The Incredibles 2 - They talked about the advances in animation and how that has improved the way the Parr family interacts with each other. I can't effing wait for this movie, I love everything about the first one.

A Wrinkle in Time - The first trailer was released and WOW. I've actually never read the book, so I'm going to make sure to do that before the movie comes out, because I am hella hyped for this movie. Ava Duvernay can do no wrong.

Dumbo - They confirmed a live action version, helmed by Tim Burton, is on the way. Meh.

Aladdin - Casting for the film was announced, and my god, Mena Massoud is handsome.

The Lion King - They showed footage; I haven't seen it. I'm cautiously excited for this movie. I like the voice casting and I liked The Jungle Book, but us this necessary?

The Jungle Cruise - Apparently they're adapting the ride into a movie starring The Rock? Idk man.

Star Wars: The Last Jedi - Nothing new released. I'm still over the moon excited.

Avengers: Infinity War - A trailer was shown and while I refuse to watch it (it has leaked online in poor quality); it sounds amazing.

Disney Games News -

Kingdom Hearts 3 - Will be released 2018. FINALLY.

Marvel Powers United VR - I'm not excited about VR, so this means nothing to me. It's coming though.

Star Wars holochess game with augmented reality - WHAT?

Disney Parks News-

West Coast Parks:

Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge - Among the beautiful models that made me cry; they revealed that guests will get to experience things like flying the Millennium Falcon and jumping right into a battle between the First Order and the Resistance. BB-8, Chewie, Hondo, Rex and Kylo Ren will be interactive characters spotted in the 14 acres. There will be a Cantina. So freaking excited!

Pixar Pier in California Adventure - Paradise Pier will be turning into Pixar Pier in the next few years. I'm really sad about this. California Adventure is becoming more Disney property oriented and while I understand it; I miss the OG California-ness of the park. That said, I'm ready for new prizes along the boardwalk; I've won and given away so many of the current offerings.

Pixar Fest in Disneyland - Disneyland will host Disney characters for the first time in 2018.

Paint the Night Parade - Paint the Night will be coming back, but it'll be in California Adventure now.

“Radiator Screams” – Cars Land Halloween Overlay - Just what it sounds like, and I'm stoked.

Avengers-themed “Universe” at California Adventure - The Avengers will be expanding their presense at California Adventure.

East Coast Parks -

Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge - Florida will be getting theirs after LA, BUT - The Walt Disney World Hotel is going to be a luxurious and immersive Star Wars-themed hotel with views of space from each room – sounds like Star Wars Westworld and I'm intrigued and weirded out.

Mickey and Minnie’s Runaway Railway - The first ever ride based on Mickey is coming!

Toy Story Land - They're getting a whole land based on the Disney Pixar classic.

Epcot - Epcot will get A LOT. A new Ratatouille attraction in the France Pavilion at World Showcase, just past the Eiffel Tower. A new Guardians of the Galaxy attraction toward the Epcot entrance, replacing the Universe of Energy attraction. New “Green Mission at Mission: SPACE” will take guests on a tour around the Earth (younger kiddos will get to join in on the adventure for the first time). New table service dining experience across the way from the Mission: SPACE attraction invites guests to travel above the Earth for a great meal and view of outer space! New “circle vision” show in China!

DUDE. The highest rated attraction at Shanghai Disneyland, Tron, will be coming to Walt Disney World’s Magic Kingdom in a brand new area near Space Mountain! I. Am. So. Jealous.

A new theater based on “Willis Wood Theatre in 1920’s Kansas City” will be coming to Main Street to feature live performances.

There will be a new Minnie Van Service to shuttle guests between parks.

International Parks

The Disneyland Paris Hotel is getting a Marvel upgrade. “Disney’s Hotel New York – The Art of Marvel.”

And that's a wrap on D23! I wish I had more photos for you guys or could speak more to my experience on the Exhibit Floor, but it was honestly an exciting and tiring blur of Disney! I would 10/10 reccomend you check it out next time it comes around.

JUNE PLAYLIST

a jordan lambert July 5, 2017

So, I've planned on re-vamping the playlist posts to be a round-up of my monthly favorites, but I really didn't get my shit together in time to re-cap June. Ah, well. Grace, not perfection. Anyway, here's some shit I've been listening to.

Bullet Journaling?

a jordan lambert July 5, 2017

I am obsessed with the written word. Not just "writing", but actual writing - - pen to paper writing. I've kept a journal religiously since I was 9 (actually, I started at 5; dictating to my mom and calling it "keeping my memoirs", because I was convinced I'd be important/famous and an exact record of my life would be needed in the future, but I count age 9 as the "beginning", because that's when I started writing on my own each night at home). I love nothing more than a good pen, a nice feeling piece of paper, and twenty minutes alone to get my thoughts out. Making lists calms me down and quiets the noise in my head. Stationary and empty journals are always perfect gifts to me. So, of course I heard about Bullet Journaling a while ago. It's gotten a lot of buzz in the past six months to a year. There are hashtags to track and a whole community of bullet journal-ers.

What the fuck is bullet journaling? Instead of re-hashing the buzzfeed article that opened my eyes to this growing organizational trend, I'm just gonna link it. Short answer? Bullet journaling exists somewhere in the world in between keeping a planner and a journal. And, to be quite honest...I don't know how I feel about it.

Now, I'm also a self-confessed planner addict. I have tried several different brands of planner. Erin Condren is my favorite (more on that later), and I've come to adapt my planner style to a combo of bullet-journaling and Erin Condren-ing.

Let's get the first thing out of the way; I am too busy, lazy, and not visually artistic enough for traditional bullet journaling. I'm semi-crafty, but I can't draw to save my life and my hand lettering/penmanship could use a lot of work. So, bullet journaling felt really intimidating when I tried it out at the beginning of the year during the blog hiatus. I also didn't want to start from scratch, in a medium that I'm not friends with. Why should I give myself a headache attempting to draw a calendar when Bando and Erin Condren exist?

Now, I have adapted how I use my Erin Condren planner a bit, taking things that I learned from bullet journaling. I keep throwing around the name Erin Condren. For those who are unintiated into the planner world, Erin Condren is a stationery brand and her life planner is hands down my favorite. I had an Erin Condren - switched to Bando half way through the year, and am back with Erin. After attempting to switch how I used my planner and adapting some tips I learned from bullet journaling, I think Erin just fits me better. I also felt like my Bando was starting to fall apart after a while. I still love their other products, but I don't think I'll have another Bando planner.

Now, my Erin.

It's 7" x 9", so it fits into the majority of bigger bags that I'd carry with me to work. The covers are layouts are all customize-able and interchangeable. I'm this one out with a black cover that's got hearts allover; goth and femme, like me. I got the monochrome interior. While the colorful is cute - - it can be a little too cutesy and a bit much to me. I also prefer the monochrome, because it doesn't really clash with the stickers I might use. Erin Condren planners start out with the year (or 18 months, since I have an 18 month planner) at a glance.

Then you get your long-term goal planning page. I've got my 2017 goals here and my planner glossary. I'll add to this page as other things come up; I'll more than likely add a "to watch" and "to read" list on these pages.

Erin Condren planners have a lot of cute little inspirational quotes in them. Cheesy, but we all know they hit the spot every now and then.

Then you get into your monthly pages. So each month has a note page at the beginning, for July I've put my current shopping list and my monthly "budget" (I'm really bad a budgeting y'all. I need HELP).

Then when you get into the month, there's a month at a glace. I don't really use this; I prefer to use my phone for my monthly calendar and I can't imagine copying it over; it's intense ya'll. I'm trying to figure out something cute to do here.

And then you have your weekly layout! This is the beginning of the week.

I label my vertical sections for three different uses; tasks, notes, and journal. I'm more "bullet journal"-esque in these sections. Super quick bullet points in tasks, short detail oriented notes in notes, and a little micro-journal in the journal section - if I feel like it. If I don't, then I don't stress about it. Decorating your weekly section is a big thing among planner addicts - stickers, washi tape, hand lettering - there are full youtube channels dedicated to it. I'm attempting to walk the fine line between planner madness and bullet journaling - cute doodle here and there, some stickers to liven it up and use the space, but nothing TOO MUCH. I think I'll also start making mini-collages here.

Just for comparison sake - this is what it looks like by the end of the week. I think the whole point of keeping a journal/planner is to be less stressed and the idea of a full-on bullet journaling was just tool stressful to me. That said, I don't want to keep a boring planner either. The fine in-between is working very well for me.

How do you like to keep organized? Let me know in the comments!

misogynoir is real as fuck

a jordan lambert June 29, 2017

De nigger woman is de mule uh de world so fur as Ah can see. - Zora Neale Hurston "Their Eyes Were Watching God"

I have one regret in my life. It's not minoring in Gender Studies while at the University of La Verne. I declared it my freshman year after taking my first Gender Studies class, then dropped it. Adding a minor would have added an additional semester and I didn't want to spend the time or money. How foolish I was at eighteen. I've been a lifelong feminist and am dedicated to smashing the patriarchy, and I just wish I had a piece of paper that backed up my knowledge when I get on my feminist soapbox and speak to it. However, I didn't do it. I regret it so much I've considered going back to school for a certificate in the subject, because I've got things to say. I don't come to you today as an academic or scholar. I come to you as a lifelong learner with lived experience who wants to make something clear; misogynoir is not Santa Claus. Misogynoir is real as fuck.

Oh, but what is misogynoir you ask? Misogynoir is misogyny directed towards black women where race and gender both play roles in bias. It was coined by queer Black feminist Moya Bailey, who created the term to address misogyny directed toward black women in American visual and popular culture. Bailey first used the term "Misogynoir" in a 2010 essay entitled "They aren't talking about me..." The term describes the specific type of discrimination experienced by black women, "I was looking for precise language to describe why Renisha McBride would be shot in the face, or why The Onion would think it’s okay to talk about Quvenzhané the way they did, or the hypervisibilty of Black women on reality TV, the arrest of Shanesha Taylor, the incarceration of CeCe, Laverne and Lupita being left off the TIME list, the continued legal actions against Marissa Alexander, the twitter dragging of black women with hateful hashtags and supposedly funny Instagram images as well as how Black women are talked about in music."

That's great, but why are you talking about it now? Because my tweet storm fired off earlier this week wasn't enough.

I know it wasn't enough, because someone hopped in my mentions asking me what black women don't get and to enlighten them, as if google wasn't free, but my emotional labor was. Universities offer classes on race and gender studies all day. Tumblr and twitter are hotbeds of information if you know where to look. But, since it's still irking me, allow me to put it here and put it simply for posterity. Black women get hated on, regardless of what we do. And I am not talking about a black woman individually, or myself. I mean BLACK WOMEN TM as a group. As a group, black women are hated by society and we don't get shit. You want a list of what black women don't get? Good, because I have one.

Things Black Women Don't Get:

To Be Girls - A study recently completed by Georgetown University found that American adults view black girls as less innocent than white girls. The study revealed that adults think black girls seem older and require less nurturing and protection than white girls of the same age. It also found adults think black girls know more about sex than their white counterparts. This study was done across racial/ethnic and educational backgrounds. Similar to how Ryan Lochte at 32 years old was a kid, but 12 year old Tamir Rice was 12 was "big for his age" and "could have easily passed for someone older", black girls aren't afforded the privilege of being girls. In American, black girls are disciplined much more often and more severely than white girls, both in the educational and justice systems.

To Be Positively Pregnant - Both Beyoncé and Serena Williams released the most beautiful maternity photos I think I've ever seen. And in less than 48 hours both were targets of think pieces about why their photos were useless and didn't matter. Becky (literally, her name is Rebecca) had to open her mouth and say Beyoncé's photos were tacky, because she didn't understand the black cultural references in them. Rosie had to invalidate B and say pregnancy doesn't look like that. She's Beyoncé. She could eat a McChicken and make it look magical. Get the fuck over your internalized misogyny and hatred of black women, Rosie. Similarly, the photoshoot done by Serena Williams, who won the Grand Slam while fucking pregnant, was criticized and it was said it should be the last of it's kind because again "pregnancy doesn't look like that". I don't care if my pregnancy won't look like Serena's. My ass doesn't look like Serena's either; I am not about to win a Grand Slam anytime soon. What I do care about positive media portrayals of black pregnancy. We're bombarded with negative criticism, even though black pregnancies aren't easy. Pregnancies and labor are generally more difficult for black women because of systematic racism in health care and lack of access to health care, period.

To Be Mothers - Black women aren't allowed to have positive relationship with motherhood. Slavery, white supremacy, and racism have created negative portrayals of black motherhood and permeate American culture. "The truth of the matter is public ridicule is not reserved for Black mothers who are celebrities. We see especially visceral reactions of hate and judgment for Black mothers that have lost their children to state sanctioned violence and or extrajudicial murders by law enforcement officers. The disdain for Black mothers is not reserved for a specific 'type' of Black mother. However things like lower financial means, age, martial status, number of children, gender presentation, and sexual orientation can intensify the hate their families receive." - Gloria Malone

To Be Vulnerable and Soft - Do I even need to talk about the "Strong Black Woman" stereotype? Kerry Washington summed it up when doing press for Django Unchained, "Look I can see how it’s not particularly feminist to play the princess in the tower, waiting to be saved. But as a black woman – we’ve never been afforded that luxury. There was no man coming to save you; it wasn’t part of the story. In some ways, this telling is a statement of empowerment." Django Unchained is problematic as fuck, but Kerry makes a damned good point. Name another black damsel in distress? We don't get to be that. Vulnerability is a form a strength, and I'm glad I stumbled across that blog post earlier this week. But this is not a thing that is largely accepted for black women.

To Be Complex - Black women are put in a box. We're stereotyped. We are not nuanced or containing multitudes. In Grad School I wrote a paper that said every black woman on television at the time was a prominent black female stereotype; mammies, jezebels, magical negroes, and angry black women. And while Shonda Rhimes is writing complex and well-rounded women, she is the exception to the rule. Black women suffer greatly from one-dimensional stereotyping. I can't count the times I've been told I'm "fill-in-the-blank" for a black girl. Black women are not thought of as complex, interesting, multitudinous people.

To Be Pioneers - The historical accomplishments of black women are overlooked. Did you know black women invented laser eye surgery, closed circuit television, and caller ID? They fucking did. A black woman invented rock and roll. Sister Rosetta Thorpe was one of the very first great gospel artists who crossed over and gained mainstream success, performing with a racially integrated band, and although guitar playing was for "men" she beat several men in guitar battles at the Apollo. She was one of the first black artist's to have a tour bus with her name on it, she was openly bisexual, her wedding was a concert for over 20,000 fans, gave Little Richard his first public performance, and toured in the UK before the "British Invasion". Where is this woman's biopic? And yet, Chuck Berry, or worse, Elvis, gets credited with inventing rock and people ask me what I'm doing at rock shows. Um, black women invented this shit. Along with my next bullet point

To Be Punk - I've already written about my experiences as a black girl in what is considered a white space and how it affects my enjoyment of the scene. Something that I thought about recently and how much annoys me though? How come black women are neglected in the scene when Poly Styrene founded the X-Ray Spex and Ronnie Spector was the godmother of Punk?
To Exist in Historical Context - When was the last time you saw a period piece that had a black woman in it that wasn't Belle and didn't have slaves? In real life Exhibit A & Exhibit B
To Drive - Say Her Name. Sandra Bland.
To Own Their Culture & Be Celebrated For It - Culture Vultures are fucking everywhere, do I even have to explain this? Cornrows, hoop earrings, colored contacts, AAVE, extensions, large lips, big butts, whatever it is that black women have naturally and culturally doesn't belong to them. When we do it we're mocked, when other girls do it, they're praised.

The Amount of Money They Deserve - The pay gap margin the worst for black women. Link.
To Be Fictional Movie Characters - Do y'all remember the outrage when it was rumored Zendaya was playing Mary Jane? Even though she wasn't actually playing Mary Jane, despite having the personality, acting skill, and physical beauty to make a bomb ass Mary Jane Watson? People tried to hide their misogynoir behind her not being a natural redhead, but Kirsten Dunst is blonde as fuck, and her hair got blonder as that franchise wore on.
To Be Characterized Positively In The Media - I touched on this earlier. But seriously. Think of black female characters on TV. Mammies, jezebels, magical negroes, and angry black women. We're always seen as loud, vindictive, petty and always ready for some mess.
To Be Depressed - I've already written about how black women are more prone to depression, and less likely to seek help because the internalized and cultural myth of The Strong Black Woman.
To Have Any Feelings That Aren't Anger - "But it wasn’t until recently that I began to see that the popular 'black girl with an attitude' trope was just a way to oppress and undermine black women and our ability to engage, connect and feel. These negative traits are consistently pinned on black women, depicting us as angry even as we calmly state an opinion, or as having an attitude when we are justifiably angry. Who cares if we are understandably angry about the countless black people murdered in the past year? The stereotype has parallels in the “strong black woman” and the “strong independent woman” (of any race): all limit our ability as women to emote, as if the only emotion we can express is anger and our only quality is strength." - Leah Sinclair
To Be Desirable - Studies have revealed that black women are the least likely demographic to have success with online dating, because of stereotyping and racial bias.
To Have Their Moment - Viola Davis couldn't accept her Emmy the way she wanted to, without a white woman telling her it wasn't about race; even though it was a historic moment for black women. Rihanna couldn't get her Video Vanguard Award without Drake trying to make it about his undying love her.
To Date People - Megan Markle started dating Prince Harry and the response was so racist Buckingham Palace had to issue a statement telling them to stop with the fucking racism and remind them of Queen Charlotte who was black.
To Be Healthily Sexual - Black women are reduced to either a mammy or a jezebel. It is the ultimate Madonna or Whore complex. Taken from the second source; "The descriptive words associated with this stereotype are singular in their focus: seductive, alluring, worldly, beguiling, tempting, and lewd. Historically, white women, as a category, were portrayed as models of self-respect, self-control, and modesty - even sexual purity, but black women were often portrayed as innately promiscuous, even predatory." Black women deserve to be able to have relationships with sex.
To Be First Lady In Peace - Michelle Obama got the short end of that deal from day one, and she was the most educated, best First Lady this country has ever seen. Not only was misogynoir rampant in criticisms of her; so was transphobia - instead of being called a statuesque beauty, which she is, she was called a man.
To Be Praised - Everywhere you look people are trying to bring down black women in general, because they hate us so fucking much. OR. They're rewarding other women for doing the same shit. Taylor Swift made the same video as Rihanna, but she won a VMA for it and Rihanna didn't.

I'm over it. I really am. "Their Eyes Were Watching God" by Zora Neale Hurston, one of my favorite books, and the book from which I quoted at the beginning of this was written 80 years ago. In it, the black female protagonist Janie, searches for love, spiritual liberation, physical satisfaction, and a way to defy the laws of gender and race. She says the black women are the mule of the world; “worked tuh death,” “ruint wid mistreatment,” yet strong enough to carry impossible “loads” nobody else wants to “tote.” However, through Hurston's storytelling, Janie is allowed to have a fuller and more complex existence than that traditionally afforded her in either literature or life. And that's all I fucking want for black women.

I am not going to let society's disdain for black women stop me from doing anything I'd like to do. I am not going to let it make me feel like less of a woman or a person. I am going to embody #CareFreeBlackGirl-ness with every fiber of my being. However when you deny misogynoir, you help perpetuate it, and that's what I'm not about to do. I am going to call this shit out when I see it, and kindly link people right back to this blog post. I'm not one of the people who thinks ignoring the problem means it goes away. We need to call out racism, sexism, homophobia, transphobia, xenophobia, and fuckery in general in order to end it. And we will end it. The patriarchy will be dismantled in my lifetime. Believe that. If you'd like to learn more, follow these women on twitter. They will school you.